2 more years

Dear Lily,

 It's been over 2 years since I started this blog for you, I thought I was ready, I thought I was strong enough. I wasn't. Not sure I will ever be the same, but I have learned so much, I feel like now I can do what I have always wanted to do with this blog. I can help others, I can share my experiences, my joy, my sorrow. Your birthday is coming up on Sunday, you would have been 3. I still picture you in my mind, as I imagine you would look like. I do this often. I wonder if it's because I feel so close to you. I imagine a big toothy grin, red curly hair, big blue eyes. Sweet giggles and you and your sister play princesses and twirl in your dresses. Sometimes I imagine how life would be if we hadn't lost you to a cruel and answer less thing. I miss you and think about you everyday. I hope I can continue this journey of life on this blog to help others, and as I do you will always be in my heart. I love you.


 Love always,

 Mommy

I finally did it!

Dear Lily,

I have been fighting the idea of doing this, scared, nervous, afraid of what feelings it may bring up always writing about my feelings about missing you everyday, but its a new year and I'm ready! Hope mommy makes you proud and I hope you know everyday how much I love and miss you! Christmas was hard thinking about what presents I would have bought you, and how much fun it would have been for you and your sister to have matching dresses, the little things I guess! I wonder what your smiling face would have been like under the lights of the tree as the magic of Christmas got to you for the first time. I really hope this blog helps other mommy's and daddies out there of your friends in Heaven.

Love you always,

Mommy